For the Love of Audio Books

After starting my new job back in November, one of the first things that happened was that I grew a bit depressed at not getting to read near as much as I used to.  I love books.  I love getting lost in stories.  More recently, fantasy or paranormal is what draws me.  I like that it is so completely unbelievable, yet when I read and imagine it – it seems like it could be real.  Another after effect of working outside of the home is complete under-stimulation.  After having worked at home for almost 4 years, having work and kids and housework to do – well, that can keep a mind occupied.  Not to mention my love of books and other hobbies, such as knitting.  I had a lot to keep me busy.  I found at work that I felt bored.  Even when I was working – and I like working, I felt like I wasn’t active enough.  It’s also very quiet at my office.  They have white noise, but no music at all.  The employee handbook indicated that we could listen to music via IPod or MP3 Player, but not using the computer.  As a result, my husband got me an IPod (using craigslist) for Christmas.  Let me tell you, my IPod is my new best friend!

At first I just listened to music.  It didn’t even occur to me to listen to audio books until about a month after I got it.  I didn’t even know if I’d like listening to books, since I really just love books.  Reading them, feeling them in my hands, seeing my accomplishment via the bookmark, it was all a part of the experience.  So I was very leery of audio books – I picked up one book from the library, and became absolutely addicted.  Now I listen to approximately 2 books a week (depending on how busy I am and how much of my work requires using the phone and meetings).  Each book takes about 2 days to get through, and usually a little more.  I’m known for “finishing off” a book at home when I’m really stuck.  It’s perfect for work.  I can do pretty much any task while listening to a book easily, and I don’t feel under-stimulated anymore.  In fact, I’m more awake and happy when I have a book to listen to.  Any down time where I don’t have a book on my IPod seems almost torturous.  I’ve subscribed to an audio book rental club – similar to NetFlix, only it’s for Audio books…obviously.  The library just wasn’t good enough for me.  They had a very skimpy selection, and when I would request something it seemed to take way to long for it to get to me.  This method is MUCH better suited to my needs.  Oh, I still read probably one regular book a week on top of that.  So on average, I’m putting back about 3 books a week.  That is some kind of record I believe…at least for me it is.  About halfway through the year I’ll probably run out of books I’m wanting to read…..naaahhhhh.

Confessions of a Carb-aholic

I just finished listening to the audio book version, and reviewing the book Confessions of a Shopaholic, which has been made into a movie that is opening this weekend.  My thoughts, and a little bit of my review of the book was a little critical of Becky’s addiction to shopping.  Mostly critical in my head though.  I just kept thinking, “Really? Are there really people out there THAT impulsive?”  I actually laughed about the fact that every other chapter she felt that she was entitled to a “treat” for being good for a few days about her spending.  Ridiculous..right?

Well, today I was thinking about some of the things that I’ve been working on to better my life and health.  Since I started working outside of the home, I’ve gained weight.  Like 10 lbs worth.  In no way do I think that I’m overweight, so don’t get me wrong.  But I do not like my “post-baby” tummy chub at all.  I don’t want to be toothpick thin, but I don’t like having the 2 month pregnant look either.  Now I’ve been working out at the gym with my husband for about a year and a half now, and since I started my job – I’ve continued to work out at their on-campus gym.  At the end of December I set a goal to loose 10 lbs in 2009.  Should be easy, I figured the weight would come off fairly simple.  Uh..not!

I’ve lost 1 lb since January.  And you want to know why?  Because when it comes to food, I seriously have no self control.  We eat healthy food.  We don’t have pop in the house, we don’t eat out every night, every bread/carb we have is whole wheat, brown rice – the works.  The problem is….I LOVE CARBS.  Especially bread!  I eat lots of it when I can.  And if made available to me outside of my house, I’ll pick the white breads over whole wheat – because I’m sooooo good every other time, that I can afford to eat some white bread. A “treat” if you will.  Notice a similarity?  Then last week I was very sick, and decided to take a break from working out to get well.  Which also means I took a break from eating healthy.  I ate out,  I had snacks, pop, ice cream!  I ate more than was necessary.  I was really surprised to find out this morning I didn’t gain that 1 lb I worked hard to get off back.

So yeah, the book did me a bit of good, oddly enough since it was just a silly book that was meant to entertain.  But it showed to me that there are areas that I lack self control, too.  It was also a wake-up call for me on judging.  Now Becky is NOT a real person, but I’m sure there is someone out there who is similar to her.  And I judged her (or him).  I just couldn’t believe that someone could be so stupid with money.  Ah, but we all have our pit-falls, don’t we?

Recipe of the Week – Mint Brownies

I made these brownies for my church’s brownie baking contest.  I didn’t win, but they were still good!

Chocolate Mint Brownies

• 1 cup white sugar
• 1/2 cup butter, softened
• 1 (16 ounce) can chocolate syrup
• 4 eggs
• 1 teaspoon vanilla extract
• 1/2 teaspoon salt
• 1 cup all-purpose flour
• 2 1/2 cups confectioners’ sugar
• 1/2 cup butter, melted
• 3 tablespoons creme de menthe liqueur
• 1 cup semisweet chocolate chips
• 6 tablespoons butter

DIRECTIONS

1. Preheat oven to 325 degrees F (165 degrees C). Grease a 9×13 inch baking pan.
2. In a large bowl, mix together 1 cup of white sugar and 1/2 cup of butter until smooth. Beat in the eggs one at a time, then stir in the vanilla and chocolate syrup. Combine the salt and flour; mix into the batter just until blended. Spread the batter evenly in the prepared pan.
3. Bake for 25 minutes in the preheated oven, until the brownies begin to pull away from the sides of the pan. Let cool.
4. In a medium bowl, mix together 1/2 cup melted butter and confectioners’ sugar until smooth. Stir in creme de menthe liqueur. Spread over the cooled brownies and allow to cool completely.
5. Combine the chocolate chips and remaining butter in a microwave safe dish. Heat for 1 minute in the microwave, stir, then continue to heat at 30 second intervals, stirring each time, until melted and smooth. Spread over the top of the brownies. Allow to cool completely before cutting into 2 inch squares.

Revelation – Church of Smyrna

Revelation 2:8-11  And to the angle of the church in Smyrna write:  The first and the last, who was dead, and has come to life, says this:  “I know your tribulation and your poverty (but you are rich), and the blasphemy by those who say they are Jews and are not, but are a synagogue of Satan.  Do not fear what you are about to suffer.  Behold, thedevil is about to cast some of you into prison, so that you will be tested, and you will have tridulation for ten days.  Be faithful until death, and I will give you the crown of life.  He who has an ear, let him hear what the Spirit says to the churches, He who overcomes will not be hurt by the second death.”

In studying this letter, it just made me very sad.  Here we find a church who God cannot find a complaint.  It doesn’t mean that they are perfect, in fact they may be far from it.  He just does not allude to any of their faults, just their excessive tribulation.  It seems that the stars are stacked up against this church so much so that God will mention no weakness.  When I read this letter I do not think of anyone in the United States.  It reminds me of no one I know.  I think of churches in third world countries.  I think of Africa with their AIDS epidemic.  I think of the underground churches in China.  I think of the outskirts of the world where poverty is eating people from the inside out.  Places where water is a luxury.  God reminds these churches that though they are poor in the physical, they are rich beyond measure.  And in truth, I believe those who suffer this type of poverty will have an understanding beyond my own, beyond the churches of America can comprehend.  There is poverty here, yes.  But we suffer nothing compared to what others suffer.  What we consider “poor” others would relish in the riches!  I’m not condemning.  We are blessed!  Sometimes we don’t know how to appreciate those blessings, sometimes we misuse those blessings.  Sometimes people really do understand how good they’ve got it – and that pleases God I’m sure.   I’m just nailing in the point that even those of us who are considered poor are privileged in comparison to others who live in our world.  This is a sad, sad thing.

I’m rambling.  Back to the letter.  Jesus also points out that not only are they poor but they have people claiming to be Jews trying to mess with their faith.  I thought of Pharasees at first.  Once again going back to people how like the deeds of God, but not God himself.  But in my Spirit, I think it’s more likely that they were dealing with people who thought they had found a better way.  They were “Jews” by name only, but have perverted the Word of God to mean what they wanted it to and were continuing to press in and, obviously demand that others believe in this way too.   I say “obviously” because in the next verse He talks about the further persecution this church is to endure.  As if they haven’t had it bad enough, they are going to be thrown into jail, and experience “trials and tribulations.”  I’m not positive of the outcome of this church, but I do know that there are churches today (I’m thinking specifically of underground churches, China perhaps) where they are still jailed, beaten, and put to death for their beliefs.  This broken, beaten church died for their “first love.”  I believe this because of what God says next: “Be faithful until death, and I will give you the crown of life.  He who has an ear, let him hear what the Spirit says to the churches, He who overcomes will not be hurt by the second death.”  I believe Smyrna, and those who carry on as Smyrna today find joy in their death for Christ.  There is a peace that falls on them because they know that they know they have the crown of life.  They know God has promised them that though dying to themselves; denying themselves to carry the cross of Christ hurt every single day of their life,by enduring beatings, being thrown into prison, persecution that I don’t even want to think about – God has promised them when they die a second time, it will be painless.  I almost wonder if they don’t wake up in the very arms of Christ, tears running down His face because of their endurance.  Wishing they did not have to endure that.  Wishing He could go and take their place AGAIN.

This letter hurts me.  It hurts because it’s easy for me to want to believe living a Christian life is a life full of blessings and love.  And it should be.  I believe that would be the will of God.  But because of the choice of man, because of free will – we have people out there that the only love they feel is by their brothers and sisters in Christ, everything else around them is not near as pretty and beautiful.  Their life is one of anguish and pain.  This is not what people generally think of when they think of Christ.  But see, He cannot go down and stop the will of man.  He has already interceded for us as much as He can in this aspect.  This stuffering comes because *man makes the wrong choice.  Man has chosen to rely on himself, on his way as opposed to the way that God has sat out for him.

*I hope it’s obviously that I’m generalizing.  There are men and women alike that make the right choices every day.  But there are many more who choose not to follow Christ.

I am HIRED!!!

After 3 months of job hunting, 8 interviews, 2 potential temporary jobs that fell through, 1 potential job offer and 1 for sure job offer, I am finally going back to work!

I’ve never looked or worked so hard to get a job in my entire life.  Most of my other (out of home) jobs came quite easily.  I worked at The Berry Company for almost 5 years, and I was able to get on with them through a temp agency and prove my worth enough that I stayed on beyond my 3 months temporary assignment.  I expected that this time around would be harder due to the financial state of the country, but naively I thought if I could get someone to interview me, I’d be fine.  HA!

My first interview was with the Dayton Commerce of Tourism.  It seemed like a very fun job, and something I knew I would be good at.  I was excited to be sent to all the fun spots in Dayton that I haven’t already been to, so I could find out all about them and be able to adequately tell visitors about these sites.  Well, someone with tourism experience slid in took this job, even though I gave a spot-on interview.

My second interview was with a law office.  This one I was sort of expecting to fall through due to my lack of law background, but I would have LOOOOVED this job.  I have always wanted to work in a law office.  The third interview was with a temp agency who loved me, got my references and recieved rave reviews on my work from my current employers.  But we had issues with the people looking to hire a temp.  I suspect that I was looking to get paid more than what they wanted to pay a temp, but I could be wrong. My 4th and 5th interviews was for a distribution center.  In my opinion, this job would have been cut and made to cater to my skills.  I seriously just thought I would have been a perfect fit for their needs, but perhaps there is just someone out there better.  My 6th interview was with Emerson, which is the one who gave me a potential job offer, but there was a lot going on that had to happen before I could get hired, meanwhile my 7 and 8th interviews were happening at Reynolds & Reynolds, who slid in and offered me a job under Emerson’s nose.  I decided I wanted the Rey-Rey job, and couldn’t wait to find out of Emerson was going to work out in my favor and loose this opportunity.

So long story longer – on Monday I start work at Reynolds & Reynolds, with some big fancy title that essentially means I’m an Administrator working under a Vice President.  I’m sure there’s much more involved there…but I won’t know until I start working.

In other news…I saw something today that I haven’t seen in a VERY LONG TIME…..Gas at one of the gas stations around here was $1.99.  I think my mouth fell open when I saw that.  I guess I had just resolved to never see a “1″ in the front spot of the gas prices ever again.

Recipe of the Week – Pumpkin Muffins

Another begin to a tradition.  I’m going to attempt a Recipe of the Week.

I swiped this recipe from another blog last year.  I can’t remember from where I swiped it – or else I’d give them credit.  But these are VERY popular at my house, and will make a WONDERFUL dessert (or breakfast at this house) during this Autumn season.

Chocolate Chip Pumpkin Muffins

1 1/2 cup flour
1 1/2 cup whole wheat flour
2 teaspoons baking soda
2 teaspoons baking powder
2 teaspoons cinnamon
1 teaspoon ground ginger
1/2 teaspoon ground nutmeg
1/4 teaspoon cloves
1/2 teaspoon salt
2 eggs
2 egg whites
1 cup brown sugar
1/2 cup white sugar
2/3 cups apple sauce
1/3 cup vegetable oil
1 can (15oz) pumpkin
1 1/2 cup chocolate chips

Pre-heat oven to 350 degrees. Mix flours, spices, and all the other dry stuff together. In a different bowl mix the eggs, oil, applesauce and pumpkin. Add the dry stuff- to the wet,then stir in the chocolate chips. Bake 20 min. A clever commenter yesterday suggested dropping this batter by the tablespoon on sheet to make soft cookies (cook for 8-10 minutes) and I think this is brilliant.

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And since this is a thread regarding food, I’ll let you in on one of my Christmas wishes.  I have a few this year, but one I’d like to get is a cookbook called Deceptively Delicious by Jessica Seinfeld  It’s suppose to be a bunch of health recipes with the purpose of sneaking health food to the kids…or well, that would be my purpose anyway. 

Revelation – Letter to Ephesus

I know it’s been forever since I’ve written a post.  There are lots of things to update everyone on, but I’m going to wait until things are finalized before I do an official update.  I’ve also been spending a lot of time blogging my book reviews over at my book blog…because we all know how much I like…no, LOVE to read.

Anyhow, I’m trying something a little different right now.  Justin and I have been reading the bible together lately, and we have started on Revelation.  After reading through the letters to the 7 churches, it got me thinking about how, while the letters aren’t addressed specifically to us, reading them again I realized exactly how timeless they are.  I’m sure if you go back and refresh your memory on these letters, I’m sure you might see a little bit of yourself in them, as I did.  So I have decided for the next few Sundays to do a mini-study on these letters and post them here.  So here we go:

Revelation 2:1-7

“To the angel of the church in Ephesus write:

The One who holds the seven stars in His right hand, the One who walks among the seven golden lampstands, says this:

I know your deeds and your toil and perseverance, and that you canot tolerate evil men, and you put to test those who call themselves apostles, and they are not, and you found them to be false; and you have perseverance and have endured for My name’s sake, and have not grown weary.  But I have this against you, that you have left your first love.  Therefore remember from where you have fallen, and repent and do the deeds you did at first; or else I am coming to you and will remove your lampstand out of its place-unless you repent.  Yet this you do have, that you hate the deeds of the Nicolaitans, which I also hate.  He who has an ear, let him hear what the Spirit says to the churches.  To him who overcomes, I will grant to eat of the tree of life which is in the Paradise of God.”

In these letters you will find that Jesus always establishes who He is as if to say, “Hey, this is God talking – listen up, this is important,” and then usually follows that up with a few good points about the church.  The church at Ephesus was full of hard workers.  They loved the word of God and stood strong in it.  They were not swayed to the left or to the right by false prophets, or Apostles who were bringing false doctrines.  And this was probably not an easy thing seeing as how most false doctrines have appeal to them.  They have a tendency to contain some things in them that we want to hear, some truth mixed with lie so it is not obvious.  But Ephesus knew their stuff, they were studied up and prepared.  Ephesus persevered through trials and tribulations.  It all sounds good and dandy right?  So what was wrong?

Well Ephesus was stuck on religion.  They were into the works, doing the deeds.  This type of “religion” is basically “earning your way into Heaven” mentality.  They really are missing out on the relationship that God offers us.  They are missing out on having a best friend, a greatest lover, guidance and a Father.  It is possible that Ephesus was even unaware that they didn’t actually “love” God as much as they enjoyed doing the work of God, which is why Jesus calls them back to when they first received Christ, when they first found their salvation.  That point in anyone’s life is the ultimate turning point.  There is a love that guides and abides you.  If you’re like me, you don’t even understand what is going on.  You don’t understand God, you don’t understand the bible – for me reading the bible right after becoming a Christian was very hard and proved almost fruitless without further guidance from elders and leaders in the church.  But it doesn’t matter that you are confused, you have found something (er someONE) so wonderful, glorious, and powerful that you (evidently) trust with your life.  I think for many Christians, it is at this point that God is the happiest with us, because it is at this point that we are loving and trusting God with that Child-like faith that He asks of us. [For more about works without love, see 1 Corinthians 13]  Jesus does through in a little tid bit about the NIcolatians, who are a people who are stuck in idolatry and the practices of Baal.  God finds it pleasing that the Ephesians hate idolatry as much as He does, and I think that by mentioning this that He knows that their heart is there, it’s just not in the right spot.   He calls for repentance (turning away from their wrong mind sets and turning towards Him).  And I love the last part; “To him who overcomes, I will grant to eat of the tree of life which is in the Paradise of God.”  Pretty self explanatory…don’t you think?

So in my life I have found myself like the Ephesians.  Getting caught up in the works of God, defending God to people who don’t like Him, answering questions to people who don’t know Him or about Him.  But in the end I have come to realize I just want to love God, and in that love the works will come naturally.

The Joy of Weaning

When I first had Abigail, I always said that she was my baby and that I was going to want to hold onto every bit of that “babyhood” as I could.  I told Justin that if I was still nursing her when she was 5 that he was going to have to put his foot down and tell me to wean.  But our nursing relationship didn’t last that long.

Many things brought me to the decision of weaning Abigail.  But in the end I think it was her stubborness that made me finally put my foot down.  Abigail loved to nurse.  She asked for it by name, and would even lift my shirt up whenever I wasn’t listening.  She was very adamant about it.  At night I would get very little sleep because she used me as a pacifier.  Every time I would try break her hold on me she would wake up and get furious if I didn’t immediately let her nurse again.  At first I was just going to night wean, but it made it worse during the day.  She insisted on nursing all the time.  She would just sit with me on the couch nursing for hours.  It was really hard at times when Justin wanted to be the one comforting her.  At a year and half old I decided that though there is definately still nutritional benefits to nursing, my mental well being was beginning to suffer.  I was getting short tempered because I was just not able to have a minute without Abigail insisting to sit in my lap.

I had thought this process was going to be a lot harder than it was.  We had one extremely difficult night.  We were up until 4am with a screaming baby.  Justin and I did everything that we could to get her to sleep, but she just screamed and cried.  I almost gave in (I was exhausted) and started to get ready to nurse her when Justin got very upset with me and took her downstairs.  It was then I knew that there was no going back.  This was it.  After that night, she has asked to nurse a few times, but she is totally aware that nursing is “all gone.”  I’m sad about it, yes.  But what I didn’t expect was the joy….

What I didn’t expect was that Abigail would sleep through the night after that first night.  I’m the one waking up now, because I’m so used to it.  I mean I have been pregnant or nursing for over 5 years now.  That is 5 years of not getting a solid nights sleep…ever.  So now I find that I am the one waking up and checking to make sure everyone is okay.  I didn’t expect that she would be off and on her own so quickly.  She doesn’t insist on my lap near as much.  She goes and plays with Elijah and Azalyah.  She plays by herself.  She is becoming more independant.  Sure she comes back to me for love and comfort.  But she doesn’t insist upon it near as much.  I didn’t expect that she would naturally default to daddy.  And neither did he.  He’s loving all the extra cuddles and love that he’s been getting for Abigail.  It’s a very sweet thing to watch too.  I DID expect that she would eat more food.  But the variety of foods has increased as well.  This is very good as she is always called “underweight” every time we go to the peditrician.

And one of my favorite things  – which is so silly, but now everytime she wants something she says “please-please.”  It’s so cute in her high-pitched little girl voice, “I wanna cookie, please-please.”  “Nana (banana) please-please.”  “Drink of water, please-please.”  It’s so very cute. 

I’m glad that I don’t regreat weaning.  I’m glad that it’s worked out so well for our family.  I am so very glad that I made the decision to breastfeed all of my children.  It is a bonding relationship that I don’t really think can be imitated by anything else.  I have no issues with formula feeding if it’s what’s best for the family, but I can’t honestly believe that it’s better in anyway for the mental, physical, or emotional well being of the baby.  It’s better for mommy too, in my opinion.

Basic Honey Whole Wheat Bread

I just want to get this down so I don’t loose them somewhere.  It is a recipe posted on a forum I chat on regularly.  I’m looking for health alternatives to the norm.  So if you have some “healthy” cookie recepie, forward to me.  Also going to be looking for a good granola bar and a Black Eyed Pea recipe.

Basic Honey Whole Wheat Bread
1 1/2 lbs recipe
place all ingredients in the order listed.

water, 80-90 degrees F —- 1 cup + 1 tablespoon
salt —– 1 teaspoon
unsalted butter, 1/2 inch pieces at room temp —- 2 tablespoons
honey —–1 1/2 tablespoons
bread flour —– 1 cup
whole wheat flour —— 2 cups
yeast, active dry, instant or bread machine —- 2 1/4 teaspoons

Going back to work

Assuming everything works out with the temp agency submitting my resume and such, I’ll officially be working outside of the home in 10 days.  I’m excited and not so much at the same time.  I’m happy for my husband mostly.  He’ll get a new bonding experience with the kids which I think will be good, and he’ll also get to go back to school and hopefully eventually do work that he loves.

I love Admin work!  I enjoy spreadsheets, and PowerPoint presentations, I love typing up document and just keeping everyone organized.  It’s funny to think that this is part of my gifting from God, but I have to give Him credit, He is the one who made me who I am after all.  Anyway, my assignment is temporary, just guaranteed until the end of the year.  My best guess would be that someone is going on maternity leave or something of that nature, since they really aren’t looking for anyone full-time right now.  But hopefully I’ll be able to get my foot in the door and find a position that I can do while I’m there.  It’s how I got my last job anyway.  I went in to temp for a maternity leave and ended up applying and getting a job in an entirely different department.  In the 4 years I was there I was pretty much every type of Administrative Assistant possible.  Anyway, I am excited.